I teach my children that wrong is wrong, regardless of who is doing it. In our home, we all hold each other accountable. If my children see or hear my husband or me doing something that we teach is inappropriate, then they bring it to our attention without repercussion. When I correct my daughter, she tells me, “Thank you, Mom”, because she means it! We do correct in love. We explain what makes an action inappropriate, not just “because I said so.” We have a very open relationship with our children, while still maintaining parent/child boundaries.
I often have people who live a less rigid standard than I do tell me that they expect my children to rebel. Do they not remember how they themselves rebelled, and they weren’t even brought up in a strong Christian household? Rebelling is what some kids do. It’s what our flesh nature does.
All I can do is pray that raising them in a loving and stable environment filled with happiness and Jesus is enough to make them want to have a life like mine.
Yes, I teach my children that certain behaviors (drinking, cussing, smoking, crude behavior) are wrong for a Christian to do. I also teach them that lying, stealing, sex outside of marriage, pride, vanity, abortion, homosexuality, and murder is wrong.
The Bible also teaches LOVE, and we never leave that out of the equation. We teach our children to hate the sin but love the sinner. We also teach them that everyone has different sins that they struggle with and that they will have their very own to deal with. However, we also teach them to REPENT, which means to turn away from their sin, not to dwell in it while making excuses for it.
It is easy for some to say that I am judgmental, because it is assumed that I am teaching my children with a negative attitude. I pull my children alongside of me, and I show them pictures of how Mommy and Daddy used to be. I share the pain and the hurt that living a certain lifestyle brings. I teach them with love. I don’t want them to fall prey to the devil’s tactics. I don’t think Jesus would have taken his 5 year old daughter around certain behaviors, although He would have gone by Himself. I don’t think Jesus looks down on me for keeping my children insulated but not isolated. They know full well the dangers of the world.
I don’t have to immerse them in sin to teach them about it.
Several times a month we have homeless people knock on our door, because we live at the church. We offer to feed them and give them direction. My husband will take them where they need to go. My children see us. They hear us. They learn from us, but they are not equipped to deal with this part of ministry yet.
My husband and I are dedicated to raising our children God’s way. We follow the convictions that God as given us. We follow the Holy Spirit’s nudging and His voice. We study His word. We pray. We fast. We are submissive to His will. If we are doing something wrong, God will let us know.